Uncle Lebong

He was my mom’s cousin.

Do you know that saying, blood will make people family, but life will make them friends? That was the case with my Uncle and I. His name was Uncle Lebong. He had several titles to many other people and to many of his colleagues and peers. But to me, he was just Uncle Lebong, my amazing uncle. And we were similar in some ways too! For one, he was very fond of me because I had eyes just like his own, and not many people in my family had our type of eyes. They were different. And in a good way. I would call him “Uncle Pussy Eye” and he would laugh and laugh. This is because he always made reference to our eyes looking like cat eyes. Anyway, I digress again.

Among some of the things we had in common, we were both currently sick. And with cancer. He was diagnosed first. So he already had a sense of what this journey was all about. And he wanted to give me some sound advice. Here I am telling him, even though he called me having already known.

He wanted to see me immediately to talk to me, to pray with me and to advise me. As it turns out, having just recently been diagnosed in October, there were a lot of appointments during the week and I couldn’t make it to Maryland to see him. At least not until November when I would have a bit of time. And even then, the side effects of the treatment left me weak, sick and low on energy.

Do you know how people always say you should tell your loved ones all the time that you love them? My uncle called me the week before he passed. This was our conversation. It was one of the worst days of my life because I was in so much pain from the side effects of my chemo that I could barely talk. I was feeling really low. My mom had informed him and therefore he called me to encourage me, as someone going through it as well, and as my uncle and friend. It was also the last time I ever spoke with him.

He died that November before I had the chance to see him.

I cried.

I cried some more.

I often wonder if he knew he was on his way out, and if that was his way of trying to tell me goodbye. He mentioned in the audio that “This thing is not for you. If I could take it with me, I would.” I suppose he already knew he didn’t have much time. The entire family knew he was sick, but we just assumed there was still a little time to do a few things with him and for him.

That day in November when I got the phone call of his passing, I cried. We had spoken only four days prior. And now, he was gone.

I miss you my dear Uncle “Pussy Eye”. You were so special to me. I know you are in Heaven with the angels watching down over our entire family. But that doesn’t make it any easier. Until we meet again, adieu!

Live each day as if it is your last.
Love each other as if there is no tomorrow.
Cherish each moment as it will soon be gone.
Laugh, and laugh hard!
Always let your loved ones know just how much they mean to you.
Life is fleeting, do not take it for granted.
And never do tomorrow what you can do today.

Some weeks later, we all went to his funeral to pay our respects.

I was not feeling well, but I needed to get to Maryland in order to get some closure. My entire family was there. That tells you the kind of man he was.

 

I love you Uncle Lebong, and I really do miss you. I know so many lives you have touched. Thank you for sharing your presence and gifts with the rest of the world. And thank you for being not just my uncle, but also my friend.

Love,
Ngumabih
See my next post where I tell you all about my mom.

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